Finish Line

I made it! It’s done. I didn’t think I’d get there and in many ways I didn’t really get there but I’ve been able to put the worst field season of my life in the rear view. I’m very close to putting a lid on the entire business year too. Just a few more little tinkers. 2018 was a stupid year overall. You’ve heard me complain about the spring already, I was dead quiet during the summer months, and this fall I’ve tried to keep my whining to a minimum. For a couple of reasons on that last one. Partly because I was too busy and exhausted/stressed to have time to whine, partly because I was doing my absolute best to stay positive and partly because there were a lot of other things keeping from my desk. The other things centre mainly on the fact that my company was sold, my future made uncertain. I still don’t have any clarity on if I’ll have a job after the holidays. I am going to make the assumption and read the vague answers corporate figures are giving the way I want because frankly, I have to, for my sanity. Now that the field season has wrapped up, I’m able to step back and it affords me time to consider. That is probably not a good thing. I’ll be following their instructions and doing my best to completely unplug and get away for the break. I still have some weeks of holidays to burn this fall so Chef and I are going to take our revenge on Texas. We has a couple days of our spring trip stolen from us so we’re going back to do and see the things that we missed after we got robbed. You can and should listen to the 6 part mini-series here. That should help me forget about work for a few days then it’s off to the North for Christmas with my family for a few days. I expect I’ll round out my break selfishly enjoying some alone time doing whatever I want. That is my luxury in the “Otherhood”. I’m still adjusting to being done work for the year, evenings I feel obligated to do something as I have been for the last few months. The line between work and home has again blurred to the point that if I’m not engaged with something I feel guilty. My only escape has been into Crave, my mind can fully shut-off and focus on something else. I’m hoping leaving the country will aid in my transition back to normalcy and out of this numb forest I’ve found myself lost in. I’ll try to keep you updated.